Top ten things for other people to worry about
by Torry Stiles
10. Amish crane operators.
9. Civil War re-enactors making the “Pew-pew!” sound when they pretend to shoot their guns.
8. People using the word, “ergo.”
7. Why no one uses the term “ram-a-lam-a-ding-dong” in normal conversation more often.
6. When “four out of five doctors” prefer one medicine over another why do we never check to see if the fifth one might have found something better?
5. What’s in that corndog?
4. Why some restaurants’ French fries do not change shape even after years stuck in between the car seat.
3. What happens to the animals that lose the 4-H contest at the fair?
2. Where the last of the good strawberry jelly went – the one with real chunks of strawberries, not this cheap store brand stuff.
1. That strange scratching noise you think you heard just as you were nodding off last night.