Top ten coolest things about living to 100

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by Torry Stiles

10. Instead of sending you junk mail the AARP ask you to leave them alone and stop asking for more
stuff.
9. You can answer almost any request with “When I used to do that…”
8. You’ve outlasted most of your doctors.
7. All your birthdays are special again … and even make the evening news.
6. There aren’t many wrong ways of doing things that you don’t know about.
5. Telemarketers selling magazine subscriptions double-check your information, apologize… and never
call again.
4. You finally get your value out of the stuff you bought that had a “lifetime guarantee.”
3. You can use “whippersnapper,” “hepcat” and “dude” in the same sentence.
2. You get to call everyone “Junior.”
1. Every time you read the obituary page you quietly tell yourself, “I win.”

3 Responses to “Top ten coolest things about living to 100”

1. Torry says:
   1March 24th, 2008 at 8:48 pm

   Thanks, guys!

   If I live to 100 I could never repay you. … Oh. Wait. That was silly. I’ll get my checkbook. … Better yet, I’ll treat the whole Southside to the next edition of The Southside Times. How’s that sound? Good. Glad that’s settled.

2. Top ten coolest things about living to 100 | TopTenCity.com says:
   2March 25th, 2008 at 1:01 am

   [...] Top ten coolest things about living to 100 | The Southside Times [...]

3. Bevis says:
   3April 1st, 2008 at 11:42 pm

   I LOVE 8, 5 and 1!!!
   Though don’t have to be 100 to do number 3… Unless you mean you can do it without getting odd looks.

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